Lane Change

As we sat in our trucks
and cars
So close to each other
But minds so far

Only thinking of what’s next
Rushing from one thing to another

A seagull floated above
Sorry for us

He was free
He was at ease

We were stressed and anxious
Annoyed and hurried

He was unaware of the time
Unaware of the congestion

We were squeezing in,
Cutting off,
Muttering profanity

He wished we could stop
get out of the lane
We had chosen
Step back
Breathe the air
Surrounding the chaos
We had sped to join

And see each other
For a moment
Not see a black car
A red truck

But the child inside each of us
Dreaming of being free
Just like him

How do we step out of our routine
To witness a better scenario
How do we change lanes
When we feel so stuck
In this “race” we hope to win

This race that ends where?
When we collapse in our beds?
When we scream at our loved ones?
When we cry out of fear,
Or worry?

What are we gaining
As we rush on
To get more
To be more
To do more

There is never more at the end of a race

There is an END

Before the end

Wouldn’t you like to just be?

Just sit down for a moment

Look around you

Smile

Breathe

See the birds as they float and soar

Smell the air as a new season emerges

Count your blessings

I feel we have all reached our limits, don’t you?

We must pause, reassess, and make sure we aren’t missing the point of being here in the first place.

I know you can’t believe you were born to push yourself to be anything you are not

I know you cannot believe that you meant to race through life, on little sleep, little nutrition, little joy

I know you don’t want to spend one more day in this “race” missing everything surrounding you

Ending in exhaustion and an empty heart

Your soul is aching to be free…

We may not be free to fly like the birds

But we truly are free to choose what we wish for ourselves

And move towards that.

Even if it’s just one little thing

I dare you to change one part of your life that causes you dread

Isn’t it funny to think we keep things in our lives that cause us dread?

I guarantee we each have one that we could get rid of

When I started to try to embrace my true self, to be a happier me, one of the first things I chose to do was to admit I hated to talk on the phone…ahhhh thats one less thing to face in this world that was bringing me stress.

As Ferris Bueller once said

“Life moves pretty fast…if you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it”

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One

“In your eyes I felt so completely good about myself ~ the familiar glow of a kind and gentle friend. I knew I was ok. That life was really really good.”

We are all one. It’s so very true. To see each other that way we take away all judgement as you could very well experience what another experiences. Make the choices they have made. Find yourself in a similar circumstance. Felt the way they have felt.

You may remove judgement all physical appearance, behaviour or circumstance and any and all hopes, dreams and desires ~BUT~also see each other with the kind of eyes that I see my son and my daughter with. Full of unconditional love. Admiration and respect. I accept their choices. I am excited to see how their own hopes and dreams play out in this beautiful story of life. The “Choose Your Own Adventure” at its finest.

Different perspectives create unique ideas that shape the path ahead for us all! Each person has a purpose and we must start seeing the value in every individual path. Especially the ones you cannot understand or have deeply engrained negative assumptions about.

We can no longer stick to what was decided in the past. We must allow the future to be written without copying everything we have already read. Use new pens. New paper. Or forget about paper and pens and write it with sticks in the sand. Or type it up for the world to see. Or maybe not write it or type it at all. Maybe I will not read about it. I will feel it.

I want to be able to do this. Imagine that everyone I meet is a very special person to me. Not just “be nice to everyone”. But see people and silently appreciate them. Cheer for them. Be curious about their journey and excited for the way they are affecting the world. Encouragement by letting unconditional love flow from your heart to theirs. Nothing needs to be said. Nothing needs to be done. Just feel it.

People you cross paths with will say
“In your eyes I felt so completely good about myself ~ the familiar glow of a kind and gentle friend. I knew I was ok. That life was really really good.”

Imagine if we had only genuine loving thoughts about the people we surround ourselves with and those we pass by. The action that’s needed will be genuinely inspired and will be in harmony with the highest good of all.

The most treasured people in your lives whether here or transitioned hold the key to this wish. When you think about those special connections you have, let all those good happy thoughts flood your mind. Then, let it be shared. Share that genuine care with every person you meet. Start with you!! Every animal. Every tree. We can change the vibration, the feel of this world. It can’t hurt to try. 🙂

To put it another way. I wish that each and every one of us feels “seen” today. Seen for the very best parts of us. Which parts are those you wonder? It’s all of your parts..the entire recipe. All of it.
Your every little ingredient is needed, valued, loved and respected. All of our parts make us one. We are all one. I see you completely. And I know you are amazing. ⭐️

I’m Here

I’m here. I need you to know.

I replay moments that we shared and ones I’ve dreamed

For you I’m just a scent and just a song away

For me you’re a whisper, a smile, a big step forward when I’m afraid and tired.

I see you being brave.
In that moment you breathe in
In that moment you breathe out
In that moment your tears flow freely
In that moment you choose joy
I am here.

For you I live in an entire kaleidoscope of infinite stories that you read and tell and remember how they were told to you while I held you in my arms.
There’s nothing like that warm, safe dream of together.

I wish for it every second I’m still.
I beg for it back when I’m worn out.
When I don’t have anything left to hide all the stuff I keep underneath.

Those days do come
I’ll be there to help you hold that heavy feeling
You’ll find peace in a memory and laughter will soon follow.

I just wish you were here

I am ~ close your eyes
Do you see me?
Just on the other side of the thinnest wall where you can still feel my presence.
Still hear my laughter
Still feel your heart thumping when you see my eyes light up for you.

I really wish I could talk to you
Just once more

You can~I hear you
I bet you can hear me too

My love knows you through and through and treasures every bit.
You get to keep that for all eternity
And so do I.
Love exists in a realm surpassing life and death.

How do I find you?
How will I know you’re still here with me?

Did you know there is no end sweetheart~~
Only places far beyond our imagination
With lights as bright as the sun
No fear, no pain, no worry
Just joy. Just love.

You may feel we have separated
But we remain
Long after we must part
Love remains~~

It will wrap you up like a warm towel after a hot bath.
It will sing you to sleep.
It will wake you when the sky is so beautifully blue
that you simply must not miss it.
Maybe you will find a nickel
Catch a rainbow gracing gloom
Spot a dragonfly under the sparkling sun
See the most delicious bloom under a peculiar tree
See a bird soar high above this Wild world.
That is my love being sent straight to you

That is when you’ll know
You have found me
When you have opened your heart
Just enough to see the magic
That remains
That is me
I am always there

I was on top of the world from the day I knew we would be together
I am still ….
Right here.
A light to guide you through this world
In your heart
And right beside you too
Every step of the way.

Keep on being brave
It matters
The tough parts are little bridges that we must trust and
we must cross.
They don’t go on forever.
They just get us to the good stuff.

I hope you do the things you love today.
Go for a drive,
Walk through the garden
Bake a cake
Drink a big cup of coffee with just the right milk and sugar.
Make yourself smile cuz that’s the time I love the most. 🙂
I love you always, forever,
and still…

The Bench

The bench that waits
Beside the creek
Where I listen
And tall trees speak

As I learn
To understand
Nature’s voice
Is calm and grand

Quiet, whispers the sun
The very best
Is yet to come

Will it be a bunny
An owl or a butterfly?
No! It is the smiles
Of a couple passing by!

Surrender

I guess I wished I could set it aside
Leave it behind
That it would disappear
Or be picked up
Cracks patched
And be ok

But that’s not how we did things
I understood it belonged to me
Only for me
And no one else
I understood that nobody else
Wanted to see it

If they did
They would see imperfection,
weakness,
failure..

So I smuggled it in
Under a lovely sleepy moon
Cursed it for not being worthy
And as the sun came up
Placed it gently into a beautiful box
Wrapped it in pretty paper
Tied it tightly with a very nice ribbon
And towed it behind me like a prisoner would drag a ball a chain

Sometimes people ask
What is that??
It looks so pretty
It seems special,
Why do you ignore it?

Oh that?
It IS pretty
I make sure it looks just right
I make sure it doesn’t get in anyone else’s way
It is only for me
And no one else

I’m not sure if I’ll ever open it..

I’m sure getting tired of dragging it around though..

Sometimes I imagine how I would feel
To rip it open
Like it were Christmas morning
And shout “Ta da!!”
“Hey look at this!!”
Put it on display for all to see

There’s just no chance for it,
Hidden within such pretty paper

But to display it, say, on a mantle
Well there,
It may fall~~
Fall to the hard tile floor
Forever set free
Like me~~

Look Within

When the outside hurts

Remind yourself  why you

Came here this time

You brought that bright shining light

Do you remember?

We do.

It still glows

It’s still as bright

It’s still yours to shine

~Look within~

 

You’ve made good use of

It’s gentle guidance

When you didn’t even realize

You were being held up

By your own two hands

 

I know it feels like nobody gets you

Nobody can really hear you

When you’re sure they did

You feel the sharp edge of doubt

And even laughter

You curse your innocence

But this is a very special part

Of who you are

 

What you are feeling

Is only meant to push you

A little bit

To remind you to

~Look within~

 

You know you set out on a mission

To bring love, joy, peace and safety

to heal all the ones

Who would cross your path

 

You listened with love

To the stories of their lives

You made sure they knew

No matter what

They were good

They were needed

They had certain joy in store,

Waiting just ahead

They were perfect just as they were

 

You must remember your own words

You are good

Your heart is kind and pure

You know how hard you try

You know you must never, ever

Look outside yourself

For approval or comfort,

When feeling lost, confused or scared

Your unique path is only to be understood by you

And if you embrace that unique path

Living from your heart

Living your truth

You will achieve what you set out to achieve

You will help heal the world

You will comfort those

Who feel as you do today

You will find it all

If you

~Look within~

 

Oh it is sweet

To feel the embrace

Of the golden universal light

The bold but delicate piece

You carry within

Must be released now

As you speak

As you write

As you encourage your children

Play with your pets

Care for a loved one

Share your abundance

And your barely enoughs

Tidy your home

Treasure your dreams

Sing along with the radio

Ignite the fire of joy

 

Can you see how quickly

That small piece you share

Becomes enough

Simply by shining it

In all you do

 

You are loved!

We are always here

Remembering for you

When you forget

~Look Within~

Set Free

There’s a wee bit of triumph we feel when we state the obvious but if it doesn’t work to improve a situation going forward it was likely best unsaid. When you look to the past and keep the momentum of past wrongs alive you will never get further from there. If you point out every misstep of another they will stay stuck in that vision you have of them. They are best set free of your company. No one is the person you perceive them to be really, not fully. They are not the snapshot of what you have seen. We are always evolving. Leave the past in the past. Be the you that you wish to be. Be happy for the good moments of now. Tomorrow is new, see the best in each other. Let your memories be filled with the good things you have seen and done. Let your friends, family, bosses, teachers, neighbours, coworkers and kids be who they are dreaming to be with no tight strings to knot them up to the mistakes made yesterday. We are all learning. We are all growing. Let’s allow each other the space and chance to adjust to the ever changing world around us. Let’s cheer each other on as we reach for changes we desire to see in ourselves and our lives.
What if you knew that tomorrow you could wake up and be exactly the you that you always wished to be? We are all our perfect selves within years of masks and fears and loss. I don’t mean physically. I mean who were you before every little bit you did to camouflage the real you? Did you leave behind interests you had because someone said it was dumb. Did you stop laughing at fart jokes to appear more mature? Maybe you joined a club to fit in and you despise every second of it. Did you give up your sports car for a minivan? Whatever it is. I wish for us all to embrace life again and remember exactly why we came here in the first place! Take those layers off –now who do you see? Sleep on it…when you wake up…anything and everything is possible. Do not let your feet hit the floor without taking a big breath and appreciating all the good stuff in your life. Then start fresh. Nothing from your past writes your future.

Ready For Change

The magic of you racing to uncover it, forced it to emerge into the sun

We were on a path,

Well worn,

Well marked,

Pretty enough,

Sufficient even,

Safe and predictable.

You left in a hurry,

With excitement and expectation.

I followed you,

Scared you may fall.

We raced together.

I tried to slow you down at first,

Battling thoughts in my head.

Do I stop you?

Do I put you back on the path of all known things

Where the familiar would comfort my fear,

Or do I run with you?

You just seemed to know that something wonderful beckoned,

the magic of you racing to uncover it, forced it to emerge into the sun

As though it could sense your arrival, all with perfect divine timing,

As you chose to listen to your inner being,

You were set free.

Free to explore.

Free to become the explorer you were born to be.

You would follow your heart,

And I would follow you.

What we found was what the universe wishes for us all,

To see life from a new perspective.

To find freedom.

To feel adventurous.

We were not bound to the rules

Of a place we didn’t fit in.

We embraced this journey,

Each step creating a new path in perfect harmony with our unique spirit.

We sat down together

And rocked back and forth,

Listening to the water flowing by.

The air around us was cold,

But we were warm and cozy like two kittens snuggled by a fire.

You were happy.

You were smiling.

You didn’t need to follow an old path through a familiar place.

You needed to be free to run and seek.

To lead us

To the beauty only you could find.

May I always be witness to the glorious life that unfolds around you,

As you create your own roads in this spectacular world.

It is ready for change.

Truth

The old truth flickers the light inside,

Some days it turns the switch right off,

And you spend a moment in cold, dark, silence.

Some may find comfort in telling their truth

Trying to make sense of what “is” for anyone listening

To feel whole and explain all the “whys” of who they think that everyone “believes them to be.…”.

Turning up the volume

As the band leaves the stage,

Produces a show that nobody came to hear.

Amplifying nothing only brings a nerve rattling, detestable sound.

Now it’s just a story

You keep telling, but there cannot be an ending if you keep telling it.

 

All your genuine effort is spent trying to resurrect something that no longer needs to live.

Old truths appear to be waiting for  you on those dreary days,

When you forget to focus on where you’re going..

It would like to be spoken,

So that it may live on.

It hopes

That you will panic,

Open a door,

Bust out a window,

Break down walls…

Just to breathe and see and feel,

Releasing it into the waiting wonder.

But don’t.

Promise you never will.

Because soon

Something beautiful

Surrounds you

To warm and comfort your insides

And hold you together,

Completely.

It is this moment.

This moment is the only truth we need to celebrate, amplify, create.

This moment, choose to be new.

The next thought, choice, move

Is all yours.

It stamps a big RETURN TO SENDER

on that old truth.

That isn’t you.

This moment is you.

And it is anything you wish it to be.

It has been given to all of us.

Every single second we breathe,

It lives in the light that shines through our eyes

When we are expecting to see through the shadows

Of an old truth, old story, old hurt, old beast, old self

And trust,

That it does NOT dwell within,

It never did.

 

Wake, Breathe, Seek Joy

Just be happy…

It’s what we’re meant to be.

And it will only BE

If you can truly BE YOU.

 

It’s exactly right to be exactly you.

This will make you happy.

It is not ok to feel knotted up inside trying to get along in society.

This will make you unhappy.

Every unique quality is like gold, to treasure and celebrate.

The value we each have,

The value we were born to share,

Is not meant to be hidden or altered.

We aren’t supposed to feel that differences mean things are harder, or will make life more of a struggle.

It would be harder if you were trying to fit into what someone else has decided is good, appropriate or necessary, to be of value and succeed.

You will struggle if  you feel you need to change in order to be worthy.

 

NO!

Don’t try to fit.

Just don’t.

You are not supposed to.

You came exactly the way you were meant to be.

Who says any passion or characteristic is more or less

It just isn’t so.

 

I am choosing to give my son a home where we trust in his true purpose

A purpose known by him and guided by him.

I choose to help him express himself in ways that bring him joy.

His very being, has brought joy to the world around him,

I see my most important job is to ensure his joy remains free flowing.

As it flows it washes away hurt, worry, stress and anger.

It always leaves a shine in the eyes of those who truly see him.

I won’t teach him “quiet hands” or shush his humm.

These are things that make him happy.

We are supposed to be happy right?

YES!

We will create a new way of life.

Where we are free to be, and live and communicate in OUR best way,

We will never conform to a tired old “normal”

It goes beyond awareness of conditions or disorders.

It goes far beyond a cute logo, coloured light and inclusion.

It is so much more than services and understanding or the lack of.

I don’t see any of those things….anymore.

You see,

I realized something because of what

I DO see.

I see him.  I see him enjoying his life.

I see him finding ways to make himself happy

I see him loving the heck out of things like trains and honeycombs.

I know he is full of pure, sweet, love.

The only time I see him upset

Is when we’re trying to make him “fit” into some ridiculous standard

Or when we push our needs ahead of his own.

It is true that as a family there will need to be compromise and it is likely there will be some annoyance along the way.

But I choose to be part of a family

That has unconditional support for each other,

Where we show big love,

Where we do the stuff that makes us laugh,

Where the cheerleading for our own, and each others

True inner joy

is so exuberant and so silly

It never fails

It just cannot.

 

I believe,

That good things can happen.

We know,

That accepting differences is the way toward change.

Where things we only dream of

Can be created in our reality

And show us all a new way.

Of course, I’m not just speaking to those of us with undeniable differences.

This is for anyone who wakes and breathes and seeks joy.

If you can take away one thought

From all of this,

Just be happy

It’s what we’re meant to be.

And it will only BE

If you can truly

BE YOU.